


Orenda.

by Error404haileynotfound



Series: Mystic Messenger Drabbles [8]
Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-11
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-07-29 07:36:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16259630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Error404haileynotfound/pseuds/Error404haileynotfound
Summary: I came across a quote I used to love (thank you Criminal Minds, lmao) and decided to go for it, so I hope you enjoy!Orenda (n.) a mystical force present in all people that empowers them to affect the world or to effect changes in their own livesSaeran could no longer walk the line between the light and shadows.





	Orenda.

Days, weeks, month went by as he looked towards the horizon for any indication that he may find companionship once again.

He couldn’t feel anymore- his body had felt cold and frozen, numb from the pain he now felt internally as opposed to the external he was accustomed to. Over all, he felt empty.

Empty.

Wasn’t the sun supposed to grace him with a sense of warmth? It previously felt so heated against his sensitive skin, the rays of the sun kissing his skin ever so gently. Perhaps he was blinded by this false hope of happiness, truly believing that the sun, with all of her love could fix him- why couldn’t she heal him? Was he truly too broken for her to take an interest in him?

The light was something he craved. He craved it for so long, silently wishing he could walk free within the heat and allow it to bind around him, like it did before. Maybe it was Him- maybe he was the light he held so dear to his heart.

No.

No, it wasn’t him. 

It couldn’t be him- no. The sun… the sun favoured him. It was the sun. Saeran… Saeran was never her chosen one. Weak, broken, useless- the sun cast him aside and deemed him unworthy. Why should such a loving deity welcome him with open arms when it was impossible for him to be saved?

To be saved.

He screamed, begged, anything and everything to be saved. He cried until his throat scratched up, his voice grew hoarse and his chest grew tight. Tears refused to prick his eyes any longer, and he was left alone to deal with it himself. He wanted to be saved, to feel the rays of light wrap around his body like the warmth a mother should pass to her kin- but they never came.

No, no, they never came.

The lack of light- the lack of light should be frightening. The darkness should be chilling and uncertain- it should grab a hold of his throat until he was left with nothing laboured breathing and the desire for the endless darkness behind that presumed light at the end of this so-called tunnel of life. It should instill terror in his heart and leave him shaken, begging to let him live and plead for it to show him mercy.

However, the darkness was gentle.

It caressed his body, his heart, his soul and his mind. It eased his ailing’s- whispers floated around his head, reassuring him that he was more. He was worth so much more- how long had it been since he thought he was worth anything in general? 

The darkness deemed him worthy.

Yes, him. 

God- no, that deity didn’t deserve to be mentioned in his eyes- the moon. Yes, that’s it, the moon. The moon was soothing, the soft light within the darkness- the dark side of it made him feel even more alive.

Alive? Is that what he was feeling? How could one truly feel alive? The presence of a heartbeat is what deemed something a living being, but what else warranted such a title? Was it this? The feeling of acceptance? The feeling of freedom?

The feeling of healing?

Healing- yes, he was healing. His heart no longer ached from the scorching the sun had left across his soul. He grew stronger with the help of the surrounding twilight- the dark gave him power, power like he had never felt before, power that could easily swallow him whole and override any control he had on his own life. Some part of him liked it.

Saeran knew what real pain was. The ache within his chest that ripped his soul to shreds was nothing short of hallow, all due to some senseless tragedy that one such as him should never have to endure, placed upon him by deities that were meant to be loved, cherished, worshiped. The darkness… the darkness made it go away. Accepting the help of the dark, allowing it into his heart, it made him the strongest- he had won.

Yes, he had won.

And he was going to win again and again. He would destroy this world- this make-believe world, and show the truth to those who were blind. He needed to show them the truth, how unbelievably foolish they were to allow the sun to blind them like it did. He can’t shake the shameful look upon the sun deity’s face, knowing how it shunned him.

For now, he felt complete.

The moon, the dark, the cold embrace of what one considers the void, that was his answer. His saviour. The one truth to this world, and the one thing that ever lovingly embraced him.

He was smothered by its love- it filled his lungs, but this burning sensation felt different than the burning of the sun. 

He once believed the sun was the answer. He wished to walk in the light and allow the radiance to soak beneath his skin and grant him the happiness he’s always wanted. Walking in the light was supposed to dispel any demons that lingered, that held onto him and dug their claws deep within him to drag him down to Hell.

His saviour was, in turn, the moon. The dark that was supposed to claw at his throat, that was supposed to do nothing more than ruin his life and make him feel weak, had saved him. Hidden in the shadows truly were his demons, but he had learned, through guidance, to accept them- to allow them to give him the strength he needed. The demons were no longer threats, they were friends. Friends- he never had those. These demons, they made sure he was never alone again. They took him over, drowning every fiber of his being within the shade and protecting him from the sun’s harmful rays. 

The moon- the darkness- she saved him. She healed him. The person he once was… he was gone. Who he was now, was the person he was meant to be. The one to purify this world, so save those stuck within the clutches of the false light- he was to restore order to those who were lost.

Maybe he truly was meant to walk within the dark- the night restores any harm that comes his way. If he were born in a different life, would he be able to walk along the rays instead? He didn’t dare to think that, in fear of upsetting the newfound mother he found within the moon. He was dependent on her now, owing and ready to give his life for her should she ask.

The sun is always praised and loved, given thanks for the life and love it gives the world- but the sun always forces the moon into hiding, reminding her how codependent she was to the larger deity. He knew this feeling all too well- he had seen this play out first hand as he was forced to hide his weakness within the shade of the rays his very own counterpart had proudly flaunted.

He knew the pain the moon had gone through; how much sin humanity had placed upon her in order to please the sun for she had saved him. 

She had saved him.

**_“For darkness restores what light cannot repair.” – Joseph Brodsky._ **


End file.
